I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I am full of burrito and curiosity
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Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
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I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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