ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
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