Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize