We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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