This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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