Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize