White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize