I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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