he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize