Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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