The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize