I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Randomize