Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize