When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
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I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
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A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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