I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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