Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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