Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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