It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize