can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
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I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
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I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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