I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Two words: nipple clamps
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