New invention idea: vibrating tampons
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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