I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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