blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
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ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
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I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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