Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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