i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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