ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
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Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
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I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
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