I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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