Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize