Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
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All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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