You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize