you turned your livingroom into a bong?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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