I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize