Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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