It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
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