Is it normal to miss your booty call?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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