He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I'm like, not good at living.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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