Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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