I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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