Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize