So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize