never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize