lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
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