I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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