Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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