haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize