I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize