Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
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My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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