I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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