I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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