I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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